Saturday, May 5, 2012

The End of the Beginning.

Source Unknown

I no longer fear the goodbyes. I have learned that the farewells that truly matter will always be followed by a distant hello, and those that aren't are meant to exist peacefully in the past, put to rest and remembered for the time shared and valued. For the first time, all of my what-if's and someday's are will-be's and soon's. I feel at peace, and everything is falling into place.

I have three days of high school school left. Four years ago, I faced the days ahead with nervous apprehension. Today, I reflect on my time here with a full heart. I finally feel I am ready to leave. I have walked these halls and driven down these streets, wearing numerous paths onto the carpet, tales to tell. I have worn down these desks and I have laughed and learned. Above all else, I have fallen in love here, with eveyone and everything. And finally, I feel as if I have closure. For all of the hours I have loved you, I can now look you in the eyes and say goodbye. Despite any pain I may feel in leaving this campus for the last time, I know I am ready to go now. I have grown up, and it has been an honor to spend it with the outstanding people I have. 

This evening, I sat alone in the coffee shop I normally visit with my friends, soaking up the environment and learning how to really enjoy being alone. As I drove home, I thought about all of the memories and conversations I have had there and on every inch of these paved streets. I tried to imagine what it would be like to leave this place. I am ready. I know I will return, and I will always have this place, and more importantly, these people, to call my home.

As I watch each of us grow up, I am overwhelmed with anticipatory nostalgia. I know we will look back on these days fondly, and perhaps someday we will find each other again amidst our new adult lives, careers, and families. And if not, I will always cherish this time for what it was.

This is in no means a goodbye, but a reflection. I have a few more months before that day comes. In the fall, I will pack my things and move across country where I will attend the Pacific Northwest College of Art for photography. Tonight, however, my friends and I will ceremoniously put on our best attire and attend our last high school prom looking like royalty.

To high school, I wish you farewell. And while it has been a blast, good riddens. I face my future with great excitement. I am ready to begin the rest of my life.

"To look life in the face... and to know it for what it is. At last to know it, to love it for what it is, and then, to put it away. Aways the years between us, always the years. Always the love. Always the hours."